real controversial opinion here but speaking as someone who has struggled with bpd (and other mental illnesses) for years and who recently got a prof dx, i think Mental I’llness Tumblr needs to stop with the concept of a “favorite person”
to begin with, it’s not a clinical term - someone, idk who, made it up over a year ago. i think the community coming up with terms to describe your experiences is great! in theory. because i’ve watched as the concept of “fps” gained traction and i have seen nothing good come out of it.
you guys need to stop encouraging unhealthy dependency and using your MI as an excuse to control people. by creating a term that has become almost another kind of relationship status you encourage people to hold their “fps” to incredibly high standards and then become incredibly disappointed and possibly self destructive when that “fp” doesn’t meet them. it’s unfair to the “fp” too, especially since they are often mentally ill too!
i almost always see this label being applied without the consent of the “fp.” if they’ve agreed to it and are willing to provide that kind of support then it’s fine, i don’t care. but often it’s not consensual and all i see is people vaguing their “fp” and saying they want to kill them for daring to have their own life or w/e. why do you guys think that is okay? why do you think it is okay to objectify someone like that and guilt trip them?
and this is just another way tumblr has become anti-recovery. it scares me so much that 13, 14, 15 yr olds are being exposed to this and think its fine. there’s nothing wrong with having symptoms, or being dependent, but i’ve seen the concept of an fp hurt SO many people on both sides of the relationship and it quite honestly results in abuse a lot of the time
before i get called ableist: yes, i do know what dependency is like. i have REALLY horrible issues with it and have for a long time. but i also know i can’t use my symptoms as an excuse to hurt others. i can’t expect others to take care of me all the time. in the end, nobody is responsible for me and my mess except for myself
ferricblue